I have been alone for a long time. Not in the unloved sense, but physically very alone. Business travel tends to have that side effect. And I found, for better or worse, that this alone-ness has changed the way I act.

I change my own light bulbs, kill my own bugs. When faced with a challenge, I find myself weighing the time it would take to ask for help, to train someone else to do something against the time I would need to do it, and overworking myself.

Conversations with my family and friends that used to open with “Why didn’t you call and tell us you made it in from dinner in the city safely?” now start with “What continent are you on today?” There is trust that comes from experience.

I am independent, and I can take care of myself. I like it this way.

I am independent, and I am submissive. I like it this way, but I don’t know how this works. I have yet to make it work successfully, and the thought of doing so is both terrifying and enticing.