Each day in September, I will be posting a question about submission, along with two responses- the first written five years ago and the second from today. I welcome all who wish to join in this exercise to post your own answers in the comments, adjusting the question if necessary to suit your own roles … Continue reading 30 Days of Submission: Day 17
Tag: trust
The Monster
As a dom, you need to learn how to accept that little monster deep inside of you that can hurt others and find some pleasure in it. -Joost of Bad Girls Need God Spankings This wasn’t the first time I’d heard someone describe our particular interest as an inner monster, something ugly and … Continue reading The Monster
Safewords and Seatbelts
Safewords are a good idea. So are seatbelts. Or so conventional wisdom would indicate. Take a deeper look at the statistics, however, and the story becomes more complicated. I remember reading a post for DJ Black, an author and dominant that I had come to respect, indicating that he did not use safewords. I … Continue reading Safewords and Seatbelts
Tears
When discussing things theoretically (i.e.- when my bottom is in no immediate danger), I want to cry during a spanking. I want that kind of emotional release, want to be comfortable enough to experience that sort of vulnerability. It sounds, again in theory, like a wonderful experience. The reality has been quite different. I’ve … Continue reading Tears
Appearance and Acceptance
“Does my hair look alright?” I asked as I tied it up- tied it not quite hastily, but not with the usual token attempt at care. You raised an eyebrow, a moment of incredulity that quickly devolved into outright laughter. “Does your hair look alright?” you asked, grinning widely. “I’ve just seen you nearly naked, … Continue reading Appearance and Acceptance
Long Distance Discipline: Reflections
Previous posts in this series As part of a new year stock-taking exercise, my mentor has encouraged (rather strongly) me to reflect on our arrangement. The results of this exercise are provided below for those of you who have been following this adventure. I confess that my expectations for online discipline were extremely low. The … Continue reading Long Distance Discipline: Reflections
Long-Distance Discipline – Update
A while back, I indicated that I was about to embark on an experiment with long-distance discipline. I have to say that I have been pleasantly surprised (and, at times, pleasantly sore) so far. As I’d seen before, any sort of regular contact with like-minded people is rewarding in itself in most cases. This is … Continue reading Long-Distance Discipline – Update
Independence, Revisted
“It’s just that I don’t think in terms of expecting anything from anyone.” -Seregil of Rhiminee* (I got a few worried messages the last time I visited this subject. Everything is fine- I'll try to explain again.) Learning to trust is hard. Particularly for the little things The big things are easy- for all those … Continue reading Independence, Revisted
The Dress
A friend recently convinced me to buy a dress. I am not a dress girl. I cannot wear dresses at work- they don't fit my profession. I wear skirts outside of work, but not dresses. It wasn't a conscious decision, but that's how it shook out. But I've decided (with friendship, guidance, understanding, and quite … Continue reading The Dress
Acknowledging Imperfection 