2017 was a very hectic year. CLASS has continued to evolve, and is a constant source of fun, friends, and occasional frustration. A minor health scare earlier in the year has helped me to refocus on taking care of myself. I’ve spent more time on a vanilla hobby, which has led to much travel and all sorts of friends in all sorts of places- and more than a little cross-over with my kinky friends (always fun to meet people in unexpected places, and to have wonderfully coded chats in mixed company). Work went nuts as well, launching me into leadership positions I was neither prepared nor suited for. Looking back I can say that I’ve emerged from the chaos stronger.
However, I am struck, as usual, by the things I haven’t done, or haven’t done enough of. I did my best, but even though I make very efficient use of my time, there is a limit to what can be accomplished in 24 hours. So, inspired by a recent discussion of lessishness, I am reflecting on the things I can cut back.
I will spend less time on admin work. After turning on my laptop with the best of intentions to write something meaningful, I find it all too easy to be distracted by menial tasks, updating trackers, organising files. Some of these things are useful. Others, perhaps not. Not everyone shares my documentation/spreadsheet fetish. It’s the emails, the reflections, the stories that count, not the tidiness of my google drive.
I will spend less time in my local pub. (The one I chat in, not the one I write in- that one I need to frequent more often.) I love my pub. I love the olde worlde feel of it. I love the way I always feel welcome- even after long, unexplained absences. I love how some of my friends there know where I’ve been and what I’ve been up do, and that they support my strangeness without any awkwardness. I love the small-town feel, the sense of belonging. The beer is ok too.
I’ve realised this holiday season that I feel less connected to my hometown than I used to. As I’ve gotten more involved in the scene, much of my time is spent in Dublin (and Cork and Galway and so on). While I miss the feeling of intense connection with this place, I have come to accept that there isn’t enough time to still be as involved as I once was. It is still home, but I have found my tribe elsewhere.
I will carry less baggage. Not a metaphor. As I live much of my life away from my apartment, I need to get better at packing lighter.
2 thoughts on “The Anti-Resolutions”
Don’t ever make New Year resolutions. That is my advice as they always get broken and then the dreaded guilt sets in. Guilt is a corrosive and unnecessary emotion for such simple things. Instead vow never to make them and simply enjoy all that you do.
I like the way you think 😉
On the other hand, setting myself up for failure can be setting myself up for spanking, so no real loss there!