I fell back into my Christmas card-sending habit this year. (Or perhaps it might be more accurate to say the habit fell back onto me, as the unsent cards came tumbling down in a glittery mess from the closet top shelf during a recent attempt at cleaning).
A lot can change in a year. Based on last year’s experience, the card list has changed dramatically (the email list also.expanded- thanks to all who got in touch in reply to brighten my holidays!). Addresses for extended family members I’ve not seen in so long that I would struggle to recognise in person were archived. In their place were new friends, often from here. I thought I was almost cheating, that the stack would be much shorter this year. The last time I sent cards, there was exactly one who went to a friend from here. The lack of representation of this side of my life on the Christmas card list had never struck me as odd, given the importance of discretion in our community. However, as friendships deepen and/or as logistics require, gifts of trust are given in the form of an addresses.
This year, there were more than enough to compensate for the non-responsive family members dropped from the list. Paging through the stack of envelopes to apply the stamps brought a strange mix of feelings- something perversely subversive about this private collection of data, gratitude that each of these people were willing to take that leap of faith in sharing something so sensitive, fond memories of the reasons why that information had been shared, and a small amount of trepidation on the reactions of the toppy types to the glitter soon to be delivered to their homes with a very clear return address. . .
But, most of all, a recognition of how fortunate I am to have so many good friends.
Thanks to all who made 2017 a wonderful experience! Looking forward to what the next will bring!
Acknowledging Imperfection 
I got cards this year from people I’d forgotten about. Now what is the right thing to do? Shrug my shoulders and say, “What the hell, I barely know them anyhow.” Or do i get all guilty, add them to my list and make sure they get a beautiful card next year? My other dilemma is eCards. Many of my lovely spanking friends are either fully or partly anonymous . I send them eCards but what about relatives? Is it good manners just to send an eCard? Should I even care? Who would believe Christmas would pose so many problems?
I think a feeling of pleasantly-surprised warmth is warranted. And perhaps a thank-you email/letter and addition to next year’s list. It’s nice to feel thought-of, either via physical card or ecard.
I’ll go with your advice.