Her: “Honey, can’t we do this some other day? I really don’t have time.”
Him: “I know you don’t have any time; that is precisely why I need a bit of your time.”
Her: “That doesn’t make any sense. Why do you never make sense when I already have too much going on to make sense of whatever nonsense you’re spouting?”
Him: “It makes perfect sense if you slow down and think about it, which you aren’t, which is why I need to intervene. Now come over here.”
Her: “Just a moment. Let me finish this report, and write a quick message to my boss, and vacuum up the leaves Mr. Jones tracked in earlier before they wind up all over the house, and return Mrs Robinson’s call before she thinks I’m ignoring her again and start the br-”
Him: “And you will, But not right now. Get over here.”
Her: “I can’t right now, aren’t you listening? How would I explain to everyone why nothing got done tonight? I have a reputation to uphold.”
Him: “And I am helping you, just as I promised that same day you promised to obey.”
Her: “And I will as soon as I’m finished with the-”
Him: “Over my knee. Now.”
Her: “Fine, but can I just get over the table instead?”
Him: “No. I want you over my knee.”
Her: “I’d much rather go over the table.”
Him: “Your preferences don’t matter right now. For the next few minutes, you are not in control.”
Her: “But I am good at being in control. Who plans all of our outings? Who makes sure the bills are paid on time? Who-”
Him: “Yes, you are very good at all that, but you haven’t gotten a single thing done tonight with all your flitting about. Time to put a stop to it before you make me dizzy. Over my knee.”
Her: “Do we have to? It’s so undignified.”
Him: “This isn’t about dignity, it’s about respect. Over. Now.”
Her: “But-”
Him: [grabs]
Her: [squeals]
Him: “You can be a leader most of the day, you do it well. But you need to know when to let go, when to slow down, when to relax and submit.”
Her: “But I don’t want to!”
Him: [spanks]
Her: [squeals louder]
Him: “All the more reason to continue” [spanks]
Her: [wriggles]
Him: “We need to make time for this. It helps your focus.” [spanks] “It keeps your head level.” [spanks]
Her: “Easy for you to talk about ‘level-headed.’ You’re not the one dangling upside down. How, pray tell, is this supposed to help my head be level?”
Him: [spanks]
Her: [shrieks]
Him: [spanks]
Her: [sniffles]
Him: “Better now?”
Her: [sniffles]
Him: “Still seem like nonsense?”
Her: [sighs]
Him: “Sit up, come here.”
[hugs]
Her: [purrs]
Him: “Wasn’t there something urgent you had to do tonight?”
Her: “Nothing that can’t wait until morning.”
Him: “I thought so.”
[cuddles]
[ends]
Acknowledging Imperfection 